Responsibility and Explanations

I was asked to blog about why Mothers have to take on all the responsibilities and how to explain to your child why you aren't together with the dad and where the dad is.
To start I will go with responsibilities. Why do Mothers get stuck with all the responsibilities, whether it be financially, or physically for the child. To me this is kind of a tough one... I wanted all of those responsibilities, personally. I would have rather he had not been there at all considering the things he did to us, and the fact he didn't even care about her until she was born. I don't mind the extra money to help out with her things now though. I guess being a mom that's what you sign up for. You can get child support and help with money, it's whether or not you choose to get those things. I choose to get them, so that helps me. I mean, if you don't want to be physically responsible for a child that's why there is adoption. I love having my daughter, she is the love of my life. I can't imagine my life without her, she makes every day so much more special. In fact, today she said "mama" for the first time :] (Pretty proud lady right here!!!) But it isn't really fair that men get to enjoy the event, but don't have to stick around for the after party. I think a lot of them have no idea what they are missing out on, babies are the greatest blessings and the best things in life. I have seen total "Manly-men" go to mush over babies (it's quite hilarious), so they can't say that they "just don't like babies"... Seriously, who doesn't like babies? ESPECIALLY your own?!? That baby is a part of you, how can you not love and adore them? I have a theory though, that men either need to "Step-up or Step-out" which means, either you are completely there for your child or you are not there at all, its better to have one or the other so it doesn't leave the child wondering, which leads me to my next topic, explaining why he isn't there or your not together. I am going to one day have to explain to Ashlynn why me and her dad are not together. Not a conversation I am looking forward to. I will have to tell her that her dad and I had differences that we couldn't work out together, so we found other people who love her just as much as we do, or that we are separated so that everyone can be happy. Its extremely important to reassure the child that the reason you are not together is not their fault. (I have people who fight me on this one) It is not the child's fault that they were conceived, it was your guy's fault for having sex in the first place! If you aren't ready to have a child with said person, then don't have sex with them IT'S REALLY THAT SIMPLE!!! When explaining this when the dad has never been involved, you will have to be honest, and say that while you love them more than anything in the world, their father was not ready to be involved yet, and if they had the chance to know the child the way you do, they would be just as much in love with the child. It will be a hard conversation whichever way you spin it, but you just have to be honest with them and make the conversation work for your situation. Just don't lie to the child so that you one day get caught in it and they don't resent you for it.

OK! Post your comments/questions/concerns/blog topics here or on facebook!!! Keep sharing stories! I <3 my fans! Keep liking and keep sharing. Find me on facebook @ The Life of a Single Teen Mom. I will post again soon this time... PROMISE!! <3 Lisa!!